Heads or Tails: Heads – Starting With the Letter “O”
Toothbrush selection is a very important decision to me. I want a compact head, soft bristles, a comfortable grip handle, … and that’s about it. I don’t like all the gimmicky features the companies are throwing at us. I just want something that will remove plaque from my teeth. And I don’t mind doing some of the work myself… I have no need for the fancy frou-frou proferred by the oral hygiene industry. Also important to me is that I replace my toothbrush on a regular basis. I have discovered that the easiest way to remember it’s time to replace my toothbrush is to always buy a new one when I buy toothpaste.
Now, call me silly if you will, but I love what I call “New Toothbrush Day.” That’s the day I use a new toothbrush for the first time. Maybe it’s only my imagination, but my teeth just feel cleaner the first time I brush them with a new toothbrush. When I am nearing the end of a tube of toothpaste, I eagerly anticipate shopping for a new brush. I typically find my way to the store at least a week before I’m actually out of toothpaste. After carelessly grabbing a tube of Aquafresh, I painstakingly pore over the toothbrush selection, narrowing it down until I’ve found the style I like with the bristle texture I want, and my choice becomes merely a matter of colour (I will usually pick the green one if it’s an option, but the colour is not really that important to me). After probably spending much longer in that aisle than any sane person would, I happily drop my new toothbrush into my cart and head off to do any remaining shopping before checking out.
Now, herein lies the conspiracy…
(And as you read this you may be thinking it is funny, but it’s not. This has happened to me enough times that I have unsettling dreams about it. I can’t bring myself to call them nightmares, because… well… it is a silly thing to get so worked up about, and I know it; but it is unsettling.)
… Anyway, I bring my items to checkout and put them on the conveyor belt, and I am sure my toothbrush is among my purchases. I sort things as I put them on the belt in hopes that they will be bagged the way I group them (that rarely happens, but I try)… so my toothbrush and toothpaste go on the belt next to each other. But somehow between putting things on the belt at the store and putting things away at home, my toothbrush disappears. I always manage to get the toothpaste home, but not the brush. And the strangest thing is the toothbrush is never on my receipt.
I can’t explain it. I have a clear memory of the selection process (it always takes so long!). I remember putting it on the belt at the checkout. Then I get distracted with other things (like that inane chit-chat the cashier insists we do, helping to move bags into my cart, or paying my total), and never see what happens to my would-be toothbrush. Does it get eaten by that gap at the end of the conveyor belt? Is the checkout person in league with the Oral-B Conspiracy, and so hides my toothbrush behind the register when I’m not looking? Is there a toothbrush goblin laying in wait under the counter? I don’t know! All I know is… Curses! Oral-B got me again! New Toothbrush Day will have to wait.
is a meme brought to you by Skittles!
July 8th, 2008 at 4:10 am
okay, i won’t laugh because if that happens to me twice, i would really be frustrated. but am also wondering how could that happen ?
thanks for stopping by.
July 8th, 2008 at 4:42 am
Aha….or should I type “Oho!”
Now I know! Now I know. We have another conspiracy to deal with, don’t we? There are so many I can name, but I now have to add the Oral B Conspiracy!
Quick, call homeland security!!! [kidding]
I love this entry. And, believe it or not, this has happened to the two of us here at our house too.
July 8th, 2008 at 5:45 am
So, I’m not as crazy as I thought. This has happened to me too. We’ll have to take a spotter with us to the store on our next toothbrush buying day for them to keep an eye on our toothbrush.
July 8th, 2008 at 7:18 am
Oral-B….
That sounds kinda sexy.
xox
July 8th, 2008 at 8:50 am
Of all the places you could’ve gone with that prompt… I gotta confess “Oral-B” isn’t the one I would’ve guessed you’d pick. Gotta give you an “O” for “originality” on this one for sure!
Then again, we’ve all kinda come to expect that haven’t we?
July 8th, 2008 at 9:51 am
Well, some conspiracy theories are both funny and true…
cjh
July 8th, 2008 at 9:56 am
Hahaha, such a fun post! I totally get “new toothbrush day.” I have a Sonicare, but that’s only because my otherwise my own efforts (sure, they have been a little lacking) result in gum issues, and this makes it quick and easy. Replacing the heads is crazy expensive, though, so you are totally on the right track your way. Great take on the theme!
July 8th, 2008 at 11:01 am
I LOVED IT! What a interesting fun post on “O”! :o)
July 8th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
What a fantastic post! For me, it would be the koolaid packet conspiracy. Thanks for dropping by my HoT. I loved your idea about blocking a whole day out for yourself every so often (on the planner). I should try that some time!
July 8th, 2008 at 12:57 pm
I am not laughing. At least no outloud. But this has happened to me (and I love new toothbrush day too) and I just had a thought. What if we bring a little tape with us on that day and tape the toothbrush to the toothpaste?!?!? It’s brilliant!
July 8th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
OHMYGOD you are SSOOO OCD! I was just at the store yesterday and saw something that reminded me of you. I almost bought it for you in fact. Come to think of it I should by a case of it for you. *maniacal laugh*
July 8th, 2008 at 2:17 pm
Well done. By the end of your entry, I forgot all about the “O”. Lots of fun, even if a little disturbing.
July 8th, 2008 at 6:26 pm
Wow, I thought I was alone in this experience… this Oral-B Conspiracy is bigger than I thought.
To satisfy Galen and Mojo, I have to respond (inappropriately) to Mark’s comment: By the end of his entry, the “O” is the only thing I’m thinking about. *rimshot* Ahhhh, I feel so much better for getting that out! The first thing I said to Erica when she told me what the prompt was this week was, “But how would we take a picture of that?”
Oh, and Erica, whatever it is, I’m sure I would love a case of it.
July 8th, 2008 at 8:32 pm
What??
What’d I say?? (this time)
And by the way with your photographic skill, I’m sure you could get a shot of “that”. (And if you can’t… I can.>:) )
July 8th, 2008 at 9:11 pm
One time I bought 8 boxes of cereal that never made it home. The receipt even showed that I had paid for them. I called the store and asked about the cereal and they said that there weren’t 8 boxes left behind. How do 8 boxes of cereal disappear?