55 Flash Fiction: Just Visiting
Thursday, August 7th, 2008 @ 8:00 pm | In my life..., In writing...
This is my thirty-fifth 55. You won’t believe how long ago I composed this for scheduled publication!
He stood in her doorway, seemingly content to remain there. She invited him back inside, but he couldn’t stay any longer; he had people to see. She nodded understanding. Yet he didn’t leave. He stood in her doorway. So she stood there, too, wishing they could just close the door. He let the cold in.
The story behind the story:
I don’t know if this is fiction or not.
is hosted by g-man. You may also visit 55flashfictionfriday blogspot for more 55s.
August 7th, 2008 at 8:28 pm
wow! i can so envision this whole thing. great 55! i’m up.
August 7th, 2008 at 10:10 pm
I think everybody can relate to this one. Most of us have been on both sides of that doorway at one time or another. Great word picture though… and I love the way you used the reprise of the first line. Nice effect.
So just how long ago did you write that one? (Enquiring minds want to know!)
Mine’s up too
August 7th, 2008 at 11:35 pm
No shit….
Get in or get out!!
And don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out!
Pensive 55 as always Smoofy…
Thanks for playing, even though I didn’t see you around to tell me.
Have a Great Week in Okie…G
August 8th, 2008 at 12:00 am
p.s. i HATE when people let cold air in LOL
August 8th, 2008 at 6:45 am
Oooo… I love all that is going on in this. I get the feelings from both characters. Awesome!
August 8th, 2008 at 7:30 am
Mmmmmm one could read so much into that, great 55 m’dear.
I’m up too.
August 8th, 2008 at 8:06 am
It’s one of those lost in the moment encounters, you know if you invite him in things will change :)
If we left the door open dad would yell, do you think you live in a barn?, I guess about every parent has yelled that a time or two.
You coming to Okieland Smar? What part …
Have a great weekend kiddo.
August 8th, 2008 at 9:47 am
Pretend like he isn’t at the door and put on a sweater! *hug*
Great story… It’s amazing how much meaning you can fit in only 55 words
Here is mine
August 8th, 2008 at 9:59 am
Great 55, I especially like that letting in the cold in the context could have multiple meanings…
August 8th, 2008 at 12:29 pm
I am with G man. In or out it should be. Hanging around in the doorway does no one any good! It makes the doorway seems like the sword of Damocles.
I like the pun on the word ‘cold’ here!
August 9th, 2008 at 3:14 pm
S, you’re an awesome writer and photographer! I found a really cool meme I couldn’t pass up. Stop by my blog for the details (too much to write here). I’ll bet you’d be really good at it!
Maybe you have a Pet Peeve to share for Tuesday? I’m launching my own meme! Have an awesome weekend.